Who Let the Dog Out?

Xanza here! OMG, lemme tell ya about what happened a couple days ago.
I gots me in some trouble.

So, Mommy let me outside to do ma bizness when she got home from work right. Well, that stupid little yippy dog next door started mouthin' off to me yet again. I don't even know what type of dog he is but he's awfully small. I don't even consider him a real dog -- he's so puny. Heck, any dog less that 30 pounds is not a REAL dog. That's just my 1 cents.

His Master is cool though...his name is Carl but damn... that dog I can't stand. Every single day, he comes up to the fence and starts talkin' crap to me. He's always sayin' how he can take me, or how he can own me, or how I am no match for him, or how German Shepards sux, or how I have no cajones. Tell me -- what the hell is cajones?! Is that like some Cajun food or sumtin? If it is, I can go for sum of dat.

Well, that dog pisses me off so much that I start barkin' at him (which usually gets the Humans upset at me). And to make matters worse, he always be laughin' at me that I am behind the fence and can't get out. He comes right up the the fence and taunts me! OMG - you don't know how much that pisses me off.

Well a couple days ago he was at it again! He started spewin' stuff about Mom. He started tellin' these aweful "Yo Momma" jokes. I couldn't take it anymore. He wasn't gonna disrespect the only person in this whole wide world that loved me. So, I found a way to get under the fence. Was seriously going off some high adrenalan and I went after him at full speed. OMG...it was so friggin' funny. He got SO scared that he froze for a second then ran straight into his house. He never even came back out.

His Master, Carl, started rollin'. But then Carl went to go get Mom to let her know that I was out of backyard and running around the street. When she opened the door and saw me outside, she did not have a happy face. She quickly called me and I ran into the house and in my crate.

Even though, she was mad at me for a bit, I don't regret it. All in a days work if I scared that lil dog shiatless.